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Postal Service - Acceptance- Top Ten 2009 Stories

Happy and Blessed New Year 2010!

2- Parenting: Acceptance Must Be Demonstrated
by  Christine Pagtalunan of Gordon Training International

It is one thing for a parent to feel acceptance toward a child; it is another thing to make that acceptance felt.  Unless a parent’s acceptance comes through to the child, it can have no influence on him.  A parent must learn how to demonstrate his acceptance so that the child feels it.

Specific skills are required to be able to do this.  Most parents, however, tend to think of acceptance as a passive thing—a state of mind, an attitude, a feeling.  True, acceptance does originate from within, but to be an effective force in influencing another, it must be actively communicated or demonstrated.  I can never be certain that I am accepted by another until he demonstrates it in some active way.

The professional psychological counselor or psychotherapist, whose effectiveness as a helping agent is so greatly dependent on his being able to demonstrate his acceptance of the client, spends years learning ways to implement this attitude through his own habits of communication.  Through formal training and long experience, professional counselors acquire specific skills in communicating acceptance.  They learn that what they say makes the difference between their being helpful or not.

Talk can cure, and talk can foster constructive change.  But it must be the right kind of talk.

The same is true for parents.  How they talk to their children will determine whether they will be helpful or destructive.  The effective parent, like the effective counselor, must learn how to communicate his acceptance and acquire the same communication skills.

Parents in our classes skeptically ask, “Is it possible for a nonprofessional like myself to learn the skills of a professional counselor?”  Thirty years ago we would have said, “No.”  However, in our classes we have demonstrated that if is possible for most parents to learn how to become effective helping agents for their children.  We know now that it is not knowledge of psychology or an intellectual understanding about people that makes a good counselor.  It is primarily a matter of learning how to talk to people in a “constructive” way.

Psychologists call this “therapeutic communication,” meaning that certain kinds of messages have a “therapeutic” or healthy effect on people.  They make them feel better, encourage them to talk, help them express their feelings, foster a feeling of worth or self-esteem, reduce threat or fear, facilitate growth and constructive change.

Other kinds of talk are “nontherapeutic” or destructive.  These messages tend to make people feel judged or guilty; they restrict expression of honest feelings, threaten the person, foster feelings of unworthiness or low self-esteem, block growth and constructive change by making the person defend more strongly the way he is. 

While a very small number of parents possess this therapeutic skill intuitively and hence are “naturals”, most parents have to go through a process of first unlearning their destructive ways of communicating and then learning more constructive ways.  This means that parents first have to expose their typical habits of communication to see for themselves how their talk is destructive or nontherapeutic.  Then they need to be taught some new ways of responding to children.*

*Excerpt from Dr. Thomas Gordon’s P.E.T. book

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3- Top Ten Good News Stories of 2009
Compiled by John-Henry Westen

December 23, 2009 (LifeSiteNews.com) - The following are the top ten good news stories of 2009, ranked according to popularity.

1) 12-Year-Old Stuns Pro-Choice Teacher and School with Pro-Life Presentation 

12-year-old "Lia" of Toronto become a star at her school and on Youtube with her five-minute pro-life speech, crafted for a school competition. A video of her speech has been watched over 800,000 times on Youtube.

2) List of Bishops Opposing the Notre Dame Invitation and Award to President Obama

83 U.S. bishops spoke out against Notre Dame's decision to honour the "most pro-abortion president in history." The widespread and public outrage from the country's bishops was considered by many to be an encouraging sign about the current direction of the U.S. Catholic Church on the life and family issues.

3) Florida Quarterback Tebow Leaves Reporters Speechless: "Yes I am" Saving Myself for Marriage

Tim Tebow, the young football superstar, literally left reporters speechless when he answered a question during a press conference about whether or not he is "saving himself" for marriage.

4) Star Trek Actor Who Paid for Three Abortions Now Condemns Woman's "Right to Choose...to Kill Her Baby"

A dramatic turn-around for the actor best known for his roles as Ambassador Soval in the TV series "Star Trek: Enterprise" and Capt. Ingles on "J.A.G.", who admitted that during his drug-fuelled youth he personally paid for three abortions for women he had impregnated. "Abortion is murder," Graham now says, after acknowledging that he will be "hated" for saying so.

5) Pro-Life Convictions Worth Risking Career For: "The Passion" Actor Jim Caviezel

Jim Caviezel, the heart-throb actor who took the film world by surprise with his moving depiction of Christ in 2004, said that abortion has nothing to do with helping women and that he is willing to risk his career to say so.

6) 400 Students Defy ACLU and Stand to Recite Lord's Prayer at Graduation

A dramatic protest against an attempt by the ACLU to silence prayer in Florida schools. Many of the students also painted crosses on their graduation caps to make a statement of faith.

7) 'In the Womb' is Now on the Net: Amazing 4-D Footage of Growing Baby

Few tools have been more effective for the pro-life cause than ultrasound. However, recent advances in ultrasound technology have made the humanity of the unborn child even more impossible to deny. This 2-hour Discovery Channel documentary presents a remarkable visual apologetic for the pro-life message that human life begins with fertilization.  Showing the continuous development of the unborn child from conception to birth, it shatters all attempts to pinpoint any other time as the beginning of life.

8) Director of Planned Parenthood at 40 Days for Life Birthplace Resigns after Watching Abortion Ultrasound

The turning point for Abby Johnson in her journey to the pro-life position was reportedly when she witnessed an actual ultrasound image of an abortion being performed on an unborn child. Since converting to the pro-life position, she has said: "I feel so pure in heart. I don't have this guilt, I don't have this burden on me anymore."

9) Bishop Hermann of St. Louis – Strongest Ever Pro-Life Column

Bishop Hermann wrote: "I may courageously say that I am willing to die to end abortion, but am I equally willing to say that I am ready to let my ego get ruffled daily for the same cause? Yet … that is where I need to arrive if I am to be a credible witness."

10) Controversial U.K. Mayor Cuts Gay Pride Funding, Pledges End to Political Correctness in Government

A rare breath of fresh air in the world of politics. "I'm not a homophobe," said Peter Davies, "but I don't see why council taxpayers should pay to celebrate anyone's sexuality." In his first week in office, Davies also cut his own salary from £73,000 to £30,000; reduced the number of councillors from 63 to 21, saving the town £800,000 a year. He also immediately announced plans to reduce council tax by 3 per cent and got rid of the mayoral limousine.

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